newsletter

November 10, 2012

0 Comments

Kate Middleton Likes Kim Kardashian, Butt…

kate-middleton-kim-kardashian2a

Kim Kardashian is reportedly feeling snubbed after a rack of free dresses she sent to Kate Middleton were returned unused.

Perhaps they were just too loose in the caboose?

November 9, 2012

0 Comments

James Bond Comes Out of the Closet

James Bond Comes Out of the Closet

Is gay sex heaven for 007?

According to a recent article in the Huffington Post, James Bond swings both ways in his latest film.

Daniel Craig told OMGG.com that while there is a controversial lovemaking scene with Javier Bardem in Skyfall, critics have grossly misinterpreted its purpose.

“Secret Service agents often use a variety of interrogation techniques,” explained the British actor. “As was the case in Goldfinger, Bond had no choice but to use anal sex as a means of withdrawing information from the enemy.”

November 8, 2012

0 Comments

Donald Trump Threatens to Jump Off “Fiscal Cliff”

Donald Trump Jumps Off “Fiscal Cliff”

He’s comically chubby, with orange skin and a goofy wig…but Donald Trump insists he isn’t a clown.

“Why do Americans keep ignoring my Obama warnings,” the billionaire told OMGG.com. “Isn’t anyone concerned that I have a hunch he’s an uneducated, Kenyan-born terrorist?”

Like a desperate 12-year old girl, the Celebrity Apprentice host took to social media this morning seeking even more attention.

If u guys luv obama ima kill myself,” Trump tweeted. “srsly guyz, ima jump off that fiscal cliff they’re talkin bout on the news.”

November 8, 2012

0 Comments

Diane Sawyer Admits Being Drunk on Election Day

Diane Sawyer Admits Being Drunk on Election Day

Many suspected Diane Sawyer was a bit tipsy as she anchored Tuesday night’s election returns on ABC.

OMGG.com investigators retrieved footage from an in-studio hidden camera that reveals the 66-year old was actually hammered.

This morning, we sat down with George Stephanopoulos, who recalled his co-anchor seducing him that entire night.

“Diane was grabbing my thigh under the news desk, but that wasn’t the worst of it,” said the happily married journalist. “While Romney was making his concession speech, she leaned over and asked if she could see my ’2012 Erection Coverage’.”

November 7, 2012

0 Comments

Stoners Already Forgot They Voted to Legalize Marijuana in Colorado

Stoners Already Forgot They Voted to Legalize Marijuana in Colorado

Doritos sales were up 300% in the Centennial State last night, as Colorado residents voted to legalize the recreational use of marijuana.

“Wait, they did what?” asked Boulder resident Shiloh Jenkins upon waking up this afternoon. “Whoa, that’s so awesome, bro!”

Jenkins, a self-described “ski bum,” says he definitely would’ve voted for Prop 420 had he not used his ballot as rolling paper.

“This vote will finally prove to my parents that weed doesn’t ‘ruin lives’,” the unemployed 31-year old told OMGG.com. “After I smoke a bowl and eat some cereal, I’m going to totally call them to gloat.”