OMGG

It’s no secret that Spain is embarrassed by their hideous red and yellow Olympic uniforms this year.

“I’m plan on hiding my face during Friday’s Opening Ceremony,” said hurdler Miguel Santos. “Our outfits look like a spandex version of a mid-80s McDonald’s uniform.”

OMGG.com has learned that the ugly threads were actually inspired by a superhero.

“We haven’t won a racing medal in ages, so they tried to dress us like The Flash,” explained Santos. “We’re going to be the only athletes not getting laid in the Olympic Village this year.”

Penn State officials are still undecided about whether or not to take down a statue of Joe Paterno.

“It’s true that Paterno helped cover up child sex allegations against his longtime friend Mr. Sandusky,” a university administrator told OMGG.com. “But the real question is, did his sculpture withhold any information?”

Thirteen-year old Timmy Harbaugh has accused the bronze Paterno likeness of being an accomplice.

“If you look closely, you’ll notice the statue is quite rusty,” said Harbaugh. “That’s because it used to be the lookout while Jerry was showering with us.”

After they squeaked by Brazil in an exhibition game yesterday, Barack Obama admitted he doesn’t have much faith in this year’s USA Olympic basketball team.

In fact, the president told ESPN that the 1992 Dream Team was unquestionably a better group of players.

OMGG.com caught up with Donald Trump, who says he wasn’t at all surprised by the POTUS’ lack of faith in the Americans.

“Of course he insulted the US team,” said the combed-over billionaire. “He’s clearly rooting for Kenya, since that’s where he was born.”

For years, Lance Armstrong has been battling allegations that performance enhancing drugs helped him win the Tour de France a record seven times.

The cycling superstar has finally had enough.

Armstrong recently posed for this year’s ESPN the Magazine Body Issue to prove he’s as puny as ever.

The world’s most prolific biker even filed a lawsuit last Monday hoping to block the United States Anti-Doping Agency from punishing him for steroid violations.

“Whenever an athlete tests positive for PEDs they’re accused of cheating, even if they pinky-swear their innocence,” the 40-year old told OMGG.com. “When are people going to realize that guys like Barry Bonds, Hulk Hogan and myself are the real victims?”

ESPN the Magazine recently released it’s fourth annual Body Issue, and James Harden couldn’t believe the male athletes they chose to feature.

“Every dude had a waxed chest,” said the basketball star. “I just paged through it and thought I’d picked up a copy of Cosmopolitan by mistake.”

Harden’s Olympic teammate Tyson Chandler agreed with the Thunder star, and emailed OMGG.com a bare-chested photo of his furry friend.

“People are surprised to learn that my face is the least hairy part of my body,” Harden told us. “I’m pretty certain my mom had an affair with Chewbacca at some point.”