OMGG

Kristen Stewart’s fans are concerned about the actress’ ocular health.

“The only excuse for cheating on Robert (Pattinson) is if Justin Bieber is into you,” explained 14-year old Kendell Lowy. “The guy she kissed is like 30, which is so gross.”

The Twilight star admitted she had no idea what Rupert Sanders looked like because she’s too vain for glasses and too scared to undergo LASIK surgery.

“I’ve been hooking up with 5s and 6s my whole life,” Stewart told OMGG.com. “To be honest, I only banged that married dude because he told me he was Johnny Depp.”

Fans were shocked to learn of Kristen Stewart’s affair with married director Rupert Sanders, but OMGG.com had noticed sexual tension between the two for months (see photo).

RELATED RUMORS:

Kaitlyn Leeb was the obvious choice to play the three-breasted prostitute in the Total Recall reboot, according to sources.

“We had an open casting call, and she was the only one who showed up with three natural boobs,” said Director Len Wiseman. “She’s saved us a fortune on makeup.”

The Toronto-born actress suffers from a rare condition called mammae erraticae, also known as Accessory Breast Disorder (ABD).

“It was great attending Comic-Con this year, because for the first time no one treated me like a freak,” Leeb told OMGG.com. “Most of the guys who attended had never seen a topless woman, so they didn’t realize anything was wrong!”