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Miss Pennsylvania Now Claims NBA is Rigged

June 11, 2012

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Miss Pennsylvania Now Claims NBA is Rigged

Sheena Monnin says exposing the Miss USA pageant as “fraudulent” was just the tip of the iceberg.

This morning, the 27-year old told OMGG.com that the 2012 NBA Finals are also rigged.

The beauty queen claims she overheard Miami Heat guard Dwyane Wade say his team has no chance to beat the Oklahoma City Thunder with choke-artist LeBron James on the roster.

Wade says he was just joking, but Miss Pennsylvania isn’t buying it.

“My years of psychological training at an online university tell me that Dwyane is scared,” Monnin wrote in her latest Facebook post. “I believe in fair play, and in my opinion that isn’t part of basketball any longer.”

NBA Commissioner David Stern has threatened to sue Monnin, giving her a 24-hour ultimatum to retract her statement.

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EXCLUSIVE PHOTO: When Tebow Met Lolo

May 29, 2012

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EXCLUSIVE PHOTO: When Tebow Met Lolo

Are Tim Tebow and Lolo Jones finally a couple?

Tebow’s teammates had been clamoring for the last two remaining virgins in the sporting world to date, and the pair finally obliged.

Jones, a 29-year old Olympic hurdler, got together with the hunky quarterback over the weekend.

The pair dined at New York steakhouse Delmonico’s before heading off to an 8pm showing of The Pirates! Band of Misfits in 3D.

Lolo told OMGG.com that she had a great time and would love to see Tebow again, but the pious gunslinger wasn’t feeling butterflies.

“To be honest, she was a bit too slutty,” the Jets backup admitted. “At one point during the movie, she attempted to reach over and hold my hand!”

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LeBron James Looking Forward to Choking in the NBA Finals

May 28, 2012

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LeBron James Looking Forward to Choking in the NBA Finals

LeBron James said he can’t wait to get past the playoff series against the Boston Celtics so he can figure out how he’ll falter in the NBA Finals this year.

The Miami Heat superstar, who essentially disappeared in last year’s Finals against the Dallas Mavericks, plans to out-do himself this year.

“He’s given us a preview of some of his planned excuses,” said teammate Dwyane Wade. “Everything from back spasms to a toothache to an ill-fitting uniform.”

Although a LeBron-led team will likely never win a championship, the reigning MVP’s teammates find him entertaining to watch.

“I think the way he suffered from ‘fatigue’ in the 2007 Finals against the Spurs was my favorite choke to date,” said Heat center Chris Bosh. “As long as LeBron’s your teammate, you can rest assured that you’ll finish the season in second place…which is still pretty awesome!”

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Tebow Asks for Another Twitter Photo to Be Taken Down

May 22, 2012

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For the second time in less than a week, Tim Tebow has asked fans to remove a risqué photo of himself from their twitter page.

“I was so wasted that night,” said the angelic quarterback. “The last thing I remember was some chubby blonde daring me to play ‘Piano Man’ with my shirt off.”

Tebow told OMGG.com he’s afraid the half-naked image of himself, taken backstage at a Broadway production of Rock of Ages, may tarnish his perfect reputation.

“Never before has a professional athlete behaved so immorally,” said the 24-year old. “I spent all weekend at church, begging Jesus to forgive my whorish ways.”

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Tim Tebow Upset With Jesus Over Merchandise Sales

May 17, 2012

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Tim Tebow is furious that his name is being used to sell religious shirts online.

“This is the second time Jesus has used my likeness to make a fast buck,” the pious gunslinger told OMGG.com. “If the Lord is having money problems he needs to find himself a real job.”

Last July, Tebow’s attorneys sent a cease and desist letter to The Almighty after a bobblehead of the Son of God holding the quarterback’s Broncos jersey was spotted for sale on eBay.

“My Savior needs to re-read the bible when he has a minute,” said the Jets signal caller. “Timothy 6:10 clearly states, ‘the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils’.”

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