Eva Longoria Named Jets Backup Quarterback

Eva Longoria insists the rumors that she’s dating Mark Sanchez aren’t true.

The actress told OMGG.com she’s been hanging out with the handsome gunslinger because she’s been named his backup quarterback.

We were skeptical at first, but team head coach Rex Ryan confirmed that with Tim Tebow underperforming this preseason, the Desperate Housewives star gives the team a better chance to win.

“Oh thank heavens,” the ultra-religious Tebow said when we told him the news. “I’d much rather get passed on the depth chart than have to worry about those two having pre-marital sex.”