OMGG

ESPN the Magazine recently released their fourth annual Body Issue, and unfortunately some of the world’s greatest athletes were missing from this year’s publication.

Detroit Tigers slugger Prince Fielder was especially disappointed to learn he didn’t make the cut.

As a consolation prize, we invited the Home Run Derby champion to pose nude for this year’s OMGG.com Body Issue, and let’s just say he hit it out of the park.

“Prince is already being called the male Kate Upton,” said famed photographer Ryan Patterson. “In all my years, I’ve never seen a man with such a curvy figure.”

Gie-Ming and Shirley Lin expected more from their son.

“We didn’t send Jeremy to Harvard so he could spend his life playing games,” the point guard’s mother told OMGG.com. “We were hoping he’d be a lawyer, like his brother.”

While Asian parents are notoriously hard to please, Lin assumed his family would be proud after learning about the $28.8 million contract the Houston Rockets offered him.

“When I signed the offer sheet I called my dad, but he refused to talk,” the 23-year old told us. “He said not to call back until I was the league MVP.”

Pau Gasol has won two NBA titles and is a four-time All-Star.

“We’re desperate to get rid of him,” said Lakers head coach Mike Brown. “Our team has no use for a 7-footer who can score and rebound.”

Gasol’s teammates told OMGG.com they can’t wait to say goodbye to the 31-year old Spaniard.

“For starters, his straggly beard kind of freaks me out,” Kobe Bryant explained. “Also, Metta World Peace is pretty sure Pau ate his Golden Retriever.”

A few days ago, ESPN reported on a young New Jersey boy who sent $3.36 to Brandon Jacobs in an attempt to keep him a New York Giant.

This morning, an equally touching story crossed the desk of the writing department at OMGG.com.

Seven-year old 49ers fan Adam Cozad emptied his piggy bank and offered Eli Manning $4 to accept a trade to San Francisco this offseason.

“I wasn’t happy about giving up my life savings, but it needed to be done,” explained the first grader. “I’d rather shower with Jerry Sandusky than have Alex Smith as our starter for another season.”

Hoping to put a stop to their two-game losing streak, the New York Mets took part in a sadistic ritual last night.

“We cooked and ate our team mascot, Little Jerry Seinfeld,” pitcher R.A. Dickey said. “He tasted a little funny, so I guess he lived up to his name.”

Moments after the cross-town rival Yankees beat them to take the Subway Series, manager Terry Collins suggested the Mets eat the chicken for the sake of strength and team unity.

“We’re a very superstitious team, and we’re committed to winning,” relief pitcher Tim Byrdak told OMGG.com. “If we sweep the Cubs this week, I can guarantee you we’re eating Mr. Met next.”