Paul Ryan Runs World’s Fastest Marathon

When Paul Ryan said he ran a marathon in under three hours, many were skeptical because he couldn’t produce any evidence.

The sexy Representative from Wisconsin now claims that bitter Democrats have been making sure no one learns of his accomplishments, including the gold medal he won in the pole vault at the Beijing Olympics in 2008.

Sadly, when a recent article in Runner’s World exposed the VP nominee, providing proof that he’d only completed one 26.2-mile race (in over 4 hours), Ryan became especially agitated.

“The liberal media has never given me credit,” the 42-year old told OMGG.com. “In fact, the only reason Usain Bolt holds the 200m record is because the timekeeper was an Obama supporter.”