This morning, 56 exotic animals — including lions, tigers, bears and giraffes — were released from captivity just outside Columbus, Ohio. Several of the animals were shot dead by police, but the remaining beasts had residents running scared for their lives…until now.
Sarah Palin, an expert aerial wolf hunter, has arrived on the scene to finish the job.
“I feel safe knowing Miss Palin is out there with a machine gun and crossbow protecting me,” said area simpleton Cletus Horner. “She’s like some sort of purty superhero.”
The former vice presidential nominee says she was happy to help, as this will provide interesting subject matter for her eighth book, which is currently being ghostwritten by her 10-year old daughter, Piper.
“I’m pretty sure al-Qaeda is behind this ruthless attack on America, so it’s up to me to stop them,” Palin told OMGG.com. “Meanwhile, President Obama is probably just sitting back in his comfy office giving illegal immigrants free healthcare.”
Sarah Saves the Day
October 19, 2011
POLITICS