Lohan Arrested; Not the One You’re Thinking

Michael Lohan, attempting to stay relevant, was arrested last night in a domestic dispute.

Afraid people would forget about him, the 50-year old allegedly smacked his girlfriend and waited patiently as she called both TMZ and the police.

“I’m tired of being referred to as ‘the father of actress Lindsay Lohan’,” said the deadbeat dad.  “Who do I have to beat to get some real attention around here?”