After Multiple Arrests, ‘The Wiggles’ Break Up

The children’s music group ‘The Wiggles’ announced they’re breaking up after multiple arrests have made it nearly impossible for the Australian band to perform.

“My passport was revoked for smuggling drugs into Thailand,” Purple Wiggle Jeff Fatt told OMGG.com. “So that’s obviously made touring a bit difficult.”

The quartet had still been planning to perform in shopping malls around their native Australia, despite Murray Cook’s (Red Wiggle) issues with shoplifting.

“Unfortunately, they’re no longer allowed within 100 meters of minors,” said Clint Brandel, a New South Wales policeman. “Let’s just say Greg Page (Yellow) did a little ‘naughty wiggling’ in front of a candy shop recently.”